I need another vacation.

Man, I go away for two weeks, and the problems pile up. I got back in late Saturday night, first problem, the door wouldn't unlock. It took me forever to get the locks to unlock. I finally got in and was exhausted and went to bed. Sunday morning I got up and ran a bath to relax before tackling the rest of the problems. I got in, laid back to relax, and turned off the faucets. The hot water faucet came off in my hand, hot water continued to gush into the bath. I tried to get it back on but couldn't so I had to get out of the bath and get my glasses so that I could see what I was doing. So much for relaxing. Then I went to the kitchen, and saw a pile of dead termites in the hall way. Note, call exterminator Monday. Next, go through pile of mail. Notice from flood insurance carrier, policy will expire May 15, it was sent out May 27, received May 31. Great. Note, call insurance company Monday. Idiots. I will have a new tenant in the condo in June, note call gas company to get gas turned on, finish fixing condo. I'm out of pills, call Humana. The roll down shutter is making a noise, call LAS. etc, etc, etc.

Monday was hell. Tuesday isn't much better. Retirement isn't as relaxing as I thought it would be. I need another vacation, but I would be scared to come back.